Quinn
Rose’s slightly intoxicated MLB 2012 preview
Sponsored by MADD: Just
because driving drunk is the most overated crime in the US, doesn’t give you
the right to do it.
And
Led Zeppelin’s BBC session: When you’re alone
in your car, no one can hear you sing off-key.
Before I began, let me
admit something very few sports previewers will ever admit. I don’t know shit
about shit, when it comes to predicting the newest sports season (in this case
MLB). But I am going to give it my all and hope that when the 2012 world series
is over, I was 100% right on my predictions. The two magazine’s I am using as
guidelines are Atlon sports, and Sports Illustrated. Athlon Sports is at a
strong disadvantage in that it is released in early February, which means there’s
a lot of preseason baseball left too happen. I have been getting it for 12+
years now, and every season there is some major acquisition yet to happen. This
year’s magazine, for example, came out before Prince Fielder signed with his
Daddy’s old team.
Sports Illustrated however, comes out a week before
the season starts, so it is much more updated. Anyway, without much further ado, here is my 2012 MLB predictions, which may be partly inspired by Athlon
and Sports Illustrated, who are wrong a lot
more than they are right. (unlike me)
AL EAST
New York Yankees
Tampa Rays*
Boston Red Sox
Toronto Blue Jays
Baltimore Orioles
The only easy
prediction in this year’s AL east is that Baltimore will finish dead last with
a bullet (probably shot by a Baltimore resident) (it is not a nice place to
live) I think the Old Men and the (Yan)kees still have one more year of winning
the division left in them. Tampa Bay has one of the best (if not the best)
pitching rotations in the game right now: including 2012’s rookie of the year
(probably) Matt Moore, who is as promising a pitcher as it gets. Besides Moore,
their rotation includes Ace David Price, Innings eater James Shields, last year’s
ROY Jeremy Hellickson, and Jeff Neiman as the number 5 starter. I mean, you
give that rotation to Baltimore, and even they might be able to contend. This
year’s Toronto Blue Jays are highly ranked by people who like getting Canadian
fans riled up for eventual disaster. They are a solid 84 win team, who in any
other division could possible finish third or even a non wildcard second. But,
alas they are in the AL East, where money does in fact buy championships and no
team spends money like the New York Yankees, who still owe Alex Rodriguez quit
a lot of millions of dollars to no show the playoffs. Don’t worry fellow Yankee
haters, they won’t get out of the first round.
AL Central
Detroit Tigers
Cleveland Indians
Minnesota Twins
Kansas City Royals
Chicago White Sox
Detroit Tigers and no
one else (oh, my.) The once and future division known as the Comedy Central, is
back to being a one team town. As if it wasn't enough that they had the AL’s
best pitcher (Verlander, as if I have to say it) and a constant MVP candidate (Miguel
Cabrera) they also managed to add the top MLB free agent not named Albert
Puljos (Prince Fielder). Of all six leagues in MLB this season, this is the
most obvious. If the Tigers don’t win the central by a wide margin, Jim Leyland
should be fired, and every player on the team should take a long look in the
mirror and ask themselves if playing major league baseball is what they
actually want to do for a living. I have the Indians finishing number 2, mostly
cause I am a rebel, and this is a meaningless blog, so nothing I say on it
matters and therefore I can disagree with SI without getting into any kind of
trouble (like a real sports blogger...or anyone that works for ESPN). If the 100 million dollar Minnesota man,
Joe Mauer is healthy, the Twins should be able to eek out third place in this
division on muscle memory alone. If Mauer takes the money and runs (doesn’t
even try to play) look for Mighty KC to go for third place in the division for
the first time since George Brett was an active member of their roster. When
you have a top 10 draft pick every year for 20 some years, you are bound to get
a few right every once in a while, and KC might be getting to pluck its ripened
vines this year. The White Sox are a joke of their former 2005 WS winning selves, and home team hero Robin Ventura should be given many years as manager
to prove ownership right in letting the lightning rod that is Ozzie Guillen go.
AL West:
Los Angeles Angels of
Anahiem
Texas Rangers*
Seattle Mariners
Oakland A’s
The future division of
the Houston Astros has one more year to prepare for their arrival, and while
they are waiting they will have the enjoyment of watching two top tier teams
duke it out for AL West supremacy, before doing the same dance next year, only
having another push-over team to beat within the division. Why the Cardinals didn’t
throw everything the city has to offer (including Nelly and Murphy Lee) at
Albert Pujols is beyond me. But the Saint Lunatics loss is LA’s gain, as the
best hitter in baseball history will now be retiring as a DH (eventually) but
for now he is still a boarderline gold glove first baseman, who should give the
Angels an extra 5 wins a season, and I haven’t even mentioned the fact that
they signed the Rangers best pitcher from last year (C.J. Wilson). For the zero
people out there worried about Texas, I would advise you not to be, as they
will be fine with what they have this season. Feliz will come into his own as a
starter, and Japanese import Yu Darvish will more than live up to his billing
as the next (or first) great MLB Japanese pitcher. Texas lineup is just as potent
as it’s ever been. The Marieners are simply hoping this isn’t the
season that Felix Hernandez realizes he would have a much better career
if he took his talents somewhere else, and demands a trade in the middle of the
season. The great Moneyball caper, won’t get any better this year, as Billy
Beane and company continue their perennial play for next year tactics. I am not sure when restocking
a team for the future will wear thin for the A’s, but I suspected they’ll be
playing in San Jose by the time it does.
Playoff predictions
Wild Card game: Rangers
over Rays
ALDS: Rangers over
Tigers (100 win season); Angels over Yankees
ALCS: Rangers over
Angels
NL East:
Philadelphia Phillies
Washington Nationals
Atlanta Braves
Florida Marlins
New York Mets
The Marlins might have
a fancy new stadium, signed a couple high price free agents, and a loud mouth
coach who all the players love (and with good reason.) But the Philadelphia
Philadelphia’s are still the team to beat, boasting a pitching staff that few
teams in the history of baseball can match, even with their historically fast
aging infield, they should still be able to win the NL East. The rest of the NL
East are up and comers (and the New York Mets) led by Washington, who is still a year or two (and decent top of the lineup) away from being competitive. The Braves will often be in
the hunt and their farm club seems quite decent, the Marlins seem to be getting
better and have ownership that stupidly thinks winning ballgames will bring
south Floridians to the ball park (it won’t) and if all else fails, the four
teams and their fans can all take solace
in the fact that they
aren’t the New York Mets.
NL Central
Cincinnati Reds
St. Louis Cardinals*
Milwaukee Brewers
Pittsburgh Pirates
Chicago Cubs
Houston Astros
Hopefully, for everyone
in southern Ohio, this is the year that the Red Stockings finally put It all
together, win the NL Central and go deep into the playoffs, they certainly have
the roster to do it, and with the weakening of the Cardinals and Brewers, Joey
Votto is the best first basemen in the league this year. If nothing else, the
Reds and Cardinals should be able to make the playoffs due to the combinded
number of times they play the Pirates, Cubs, and Astros this year. The brew
crew might give them a little pause this season, but it’s nothing that the Reds
and Cards current roster can’t get through.
NL West
Arizona Diamondbacks
San Francisco Giants*
Colorado Rockies
L.A. Trolley Dodgers
San Diego Padres
The good news for the
top four teams in the NL West is that they all get to play the Padres a bunch of
times, the bad news is that every other team is quite capable of winning the
West. The four top teams will be hoping to pounce on any given chance they get. The D-Backs should
be able to slither their way back to first place this year, they have a good core
of players just starting to come into their prime. The Giants went from winning
the WS to not being able to score 2 runs a game for their best pitcher. This
season is looking good for them as they have a great pitching staff again and
just need to figure out how to get their bats off their shoulders, also, catcher Buster Posey is coming back to play full time for them. The Rockies
are in the same place they've been over the past few years and will once again be
sliding down towards Padres country once the Dodgers new ownership starts
spreading its wings and spending its capital.
NL Wildcard: Giants
over Cardinals
NLDS: Reds over Giants,
Phillies over D-Backs
NLCS: Reds Over
Phillies
World Series: Rangers
over Reds
This is the year the
Ranger finally win, and before you all bitch and complain about me picking the
Rangers simply cause they are may favorite team, let me say that you are right.
I picked the Rangers partly cause they are my favorite team. But, I also
honestly believe this is the year they go from being the Buffalo Bills of
baseball to being the Atlanta Braves of the 2010’s American League.
And that ladies and
gentleman, is my Baseball preview for 2012.
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